Monday 26 May 2014

DAMAGING DAMAD JIS

DAMAGING DAMAD JIS

Damad in Hindi means someone who entered or joined the house. Ji is just a syllable showing respect, the Indian way.

Sonia is a damad to the Nehru family, because an incumbent family member Rajiv, married her. Robber t Vadhra is another damad. Because, Priyanka, another sitting member of the house (no pun intended) married and ushered him inside the house.

There is a saying that when you marry, marry a befitting one; neither too high nor too low in status. Find your 'match' ! Compatible couples live longer and more meaningfully. Because they understand each other and adjust easily with one another. Perfect match ! Jodi number one.

But this perfect match making is better said than done. Because what is the befitting match itself is relative or ambiguous. One can say equality in wealth is a parameter. Education is another. Looks and size are another etc. So a similar looking couple having compatible education and family status may be roughly considered as the right match.

I hope. Because this is not my idea anyway. Just trying to understand or digest the concept. That is all.

But as we know, life plays itself out the way it does. Thus the perfect matches happen only very rarely. Most become adjustments. Managing such adjustments is called life. Right ?

That is still acceptable. The tragedy is something else.

At times there would be grossly improper match makings, may be due to compulsions. Diana to Charles was one such. It simply was no match. Everyone knows it too ! How ? I have no idea. But still we all know it was no match !.

In such situations, the partner who is lower in 'status' will drag the other to his / her level. Remember, 'status' does not mean social position here. It simply means one's true being. What one is intrinsically at heart. Nothing to do with riches, education or physical looks. the personality within. That would decide who leads (or drags) the other. Finally both settle at some compromise point. Their life stagnates there as a couple. Synchronized bio-motors.

A man married a poor woman. His relatives were unhappy. They wanted the incoming woman to bring in riches. But he was firm on his decision. Ex Military. Tough. So none openly confronted him. Besides he was a gentleman. Very helpful to any one who approaches him for a help. He would, for example, go for weddings, the day before and help them in conducting the marriage, by taking up the jobs himself, even helping in cooking all night.

His wife understood the underlying feelings of in laws because of her lower financial status.

After a few months, the husband beat her up.

Why ?

Because to get over the silent ridicule among the family members, she started cooking up stories about the earlier status of ancestors. Her great grand father was the Minister of a King ! Only issue is none has seen him or heard this story before. She started harping on this story every time. Finally the ever patient husband gentleman got fed up.

The aging Charles, could not match the youthfulness and health levels of Diana. They had two kids during the course, which was the real purpose of Charles marrying her. To have a young strong womb to bear royal heirs.

Then Charles dropped to his real status with his real match, Camila. Realizing this, Diana took her freedom and sought her own match elsewhere. The royal family would blame Diana, being the outsider who came into their house. But the world would blame Charles.

Take the case of Sonia. Correct me if wrong.

Sonia was a waitress (or bar dancer ?) in a canteen at Oxford University where the Nehru scion Rajiv studied. As he was not good in studies, he spent more time in the canteen than inside the classroom> Thus he got used to Sonia. They married and had two children, Rahul and Priyanka.

Nehru family is known to be power hungry and seeking attention, to be regarded as the emperors of India among many smaller dynasty kings. But they were never linked to corruption or personal wealth making.

That is until Sonia 'entered' their house.

The first scam that broke out was on Bofors gun deal. Rajiv ordered big guns from Sweden. An Italian named Quottrochi received ten million dollars as kickback. And Quottrochi was close to Sonia ! When the allegations were gathering steam Rajiv was assassinated. Sonia came to power. The Indian crime investigation agency goofed up with the investigation and Quottrochi walked free. Indians were more worried about the untimely death of Rajiv Gandhi than the ten millions Quottrochi stashed away.

Sonia got one life there.

Priyanka married then. She was such a desirable woman that any Indian would have loved to have her hand in marriage. Including Billionaires or stars or kings. Sonia was alone to decide as parent. She chose a christian small time businessman dealing with brass items, thus shocking the whole nation. If Rajiv was around, it is doubtful if Priyanka would have been allowed to marry him. After the marriage, the news broke out that Sonia's relatives have a brass sculpture shop in Italy from where idols of Indian deities are sold.

Sonia cannot behave like Rajiv. These are two different beings got connected due to some reason. She is alleged of interfering in the Government files in such a way as to benefit the underhand dealers. The kickbacks were allegedly transferred to her son-in-law's name, who became a billionaire in a few years !

The son in law claims he was gifted the property by the real estate companies because of his closeness with them. How Sweet ! Strictly a private matter ! LOL !

Where is Nehru family now ? At the level of the in laws who 'entered' their house.

Hence the saying. Marry equals only. Else the one lower would drag the other to the level he/she is used to or comfortable with.

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